Love and Lust

So I've slept with a few guys, and I've grown emotionally attached to some of them. With that, I've learned how to tell pretty quickly if a guy is someone I would like to sleep with. A friend of mine, who is less experienced, had a pretty embarrassing night last night. She slept with a friend who came up to visit her and it did not go well at all. Despite his age, he didn't seem to know he needed a larger size condom and this morning she got Plan B and is now paranoid she will be pregnant. For me I can't imagine being in that situation, even though in the past I have. Love and lust are both learning experiences. I've had to learn what kinds of guys I don't want to be with, and what questions to ask. I don't sleep with someone before asking questions about their sex lives and sexuality. I didn't always do that, it is something I've learned and something I wouldn't do if I hadn't had bad/awkward experiences in the past.
The same thing happens with love. I know this from experience and I am sure others will agree, you really don't know what you want until you've been with someone. That is how you figure out what you like, and don't like. Even though I knew me and my ex were not going to be together forever, and I saw all the problems in the relationship, it was something I didn't want to end, cause it hurts to not be with someone you love, even if it isn't the best thing for you. It takes bad experiences to learn what you need and want from both sex and relationships.
Hello Saferide-The Quiz
At the same time, love and lust are hard to control...

So after saying all of that, the you learn stuff. No matter how much you learn, you still mess up. So I've let myself get emotionally attached to a man. A man that I love sleeping with, but I can't see myself being serious with. I can see us fighting if we lived together all the time. He can be a ridiculous human being, very loud and out there.  That is something I love about him, but something I could not handle every day. He has some habits that I am not a fan of, and I do not expect him to change them for me, but I think they would lead to arguments I don't want to have. I love him for who he is, I don't expect him to change for me and I love the relationship we have together now. I know it won't last, and it hurts just to think about losing it. The thing with love is you can only do so much to stop it and if you try to hard to stop it, you lose out on so many things in life.
I'm at a place where I can't be in love. I am graduating and go back to Maine for a few months, then moving to Albany for graduate school, where I will be too busy for that kind of commitment, especially with someone who is 3 hours away. So even though I know that I should be with him, I can't help but love him. Not as much as my ex, it is way too soon for that. Love has so many degrees and means so many different things.
Priscilla Ahn one of my favorite artists has a new album called When You Grow Up and here is a track from it...
Priscilla Ahn-I Don't Have Time to Be in Love